But It Keeps On Lingering...

.... previous

Morning of May 15 of 2006:

"Yeah. We'll meet at exactly 10am, hotel's lobby. Sure. Bye Uncle."

Dane dropped her cellphone after talking to her Uncle Resty about his offer to Karla. She will be featured on Filipinas, a well known magazine being circulated in the whole of US. Uncle Resty was a freelance writer of the said magazine and he wanted Karla's portrait be his subject: The Shape of the New Future Filipina. Her looks was stunning and her image somehow captivated the creative mind of Mr. Restituto Marasigan.

"Are you having second thoughts, Karla? Just tell me. Maybe, Uncle Resty will understand if you don't feel like taking the photo shoot. There you go again, Kaye. Having those insecurities will not help you. Look at yourself in the mirror! You're such an amazing woman... so beautiful and fresh. Don't be naive, Kaye. Bring out that confidence! Strike a pose like this."

Dane was starting to look like a jolly clown in front of Karla. Teasing her... persuading her to say yes.

"Is that a yes? I saw those dimples. I knew it! You can't say no to me." Dane gave her friend a big hug.

"Let me see, which dress will suit you the best. This one? NO no no. I like this one. It's better on you." She put aside three of the nicest wardrobe in Karla's closet and placed them on a medium-sized suitcase.

"Well then, everything's ready so, let's go."

Karla was in a perfect white halter tea-length dress with pintucking ruffles and eyelet ribbon accents. She looks so enchanting.

next ....

A Dream To Last


twice i've tried to seek for love
but neither i succeed.
i've loved and cared for once
and for only once i did.
the chance i never had
to catch a sight of view
for a thing along the path
had blocked my way to you.

so true a love that bloomed
on a land with a heart unsure
can find no gleam of light
but a room too shadowed and obscure.
the pain of truth, i feared to face
but the wheel of life shall live to chase.

what you sense today
doesn't mean tomorrow.
more fancy dreams are yet to follow.
it's only time can fill the gap
of two adjacent roads
that fell apart.

after an eye had shed a tear
no trace was left for me to cheer
but an old swain gave a life anew
then vowed unfailing words of hue.

i clutched the luck, begun to sham
despite the truth i gave no damn.
forced myself to carry on
and took the risk to oblivion.

the more i tried to work it out
the harder it was to turn about
no matter how much the love had shown
this heart of mine couldn't just bestowed.

i woke up then and i realized
that using him wasn't the right disguise
there's no other way to right a wrong
but to be certain and strong.

two in a row, i toiled in vain.
yet not a thorn to start again
i'll search, i'll quest, i'll even cast
so long the time allows this dream to last.


paano ba ang magmahal?
madaling sabihin, subalit mahirap gawin
may bawat dahilan
iba't-iba ang paraan.
damdamin mo ngayon
maaaring di na bukas...
ngunit para sa ilan
totoong walang wakas.

magmahal, kapag natutunan
dapat handa kang masaktan.
makasarili ka man
o sadyang mapagparaya...
mundo mo'y walang kulay
kundi gagamitin
pusong may kaugnay.
sa isipang makitid,
di marunong umunawa
minsang pagkakamali'y
walang kapatawaran.
bahagi na ng isang malawak
na pagtingin...
ang magtiis ano man
ang sapitin.
katangahan para sa iba,
kaligayahan para
sa kanya.

may mga tanong,
sagot din ay bakit.
hindi matiyak ang tunay sa hindi
pagod nang makinig
sa mga pangako.
umasa na lang
kung darating pa nga.
saan papunta ang daang
tinungo mo?
ginustong gumamit
sa halip na umibig.
naging manhid at maramot
makasarili at mapag-imbot.
bakit di lang dapat isa
ang magdurusa't
ganyan ba talaga
ang magmahal nang tunay?
kahit na mali
ay ginagawa pa ring tama
katumbas ng isang pangarap
ang makapiling kang lagi.
kapag nawala sa paningin,
tila isang masamang

nasa ikli ba
o haba ng pagsasama
ang sukatan kung paano magmahal
nasa dalas ba ng pagkikita
o minsang paghihiwalay?
di ba't sa kabuluhan
ng bawat sandali...
at sa tibay na namagitan
mananatili ang pag-asang
magsasama habambuhay

To The One I Dearly Love

never have i cared for someone
as much as i have cared for you
so never will i give you up.
... through thick and thin, i'm here to stay.

Photo link

never in my life i have felt
this strength of feelings
as much as i have felt when you're around.
... through joy and pain, i'll stick with you.

Photo link

never in my dreams
i pictured you
but when you came along
... i woke up to face reality.

Photo link

never have i thought,
i would take the risk of forgetting someone
i used to love before
but when i've known you
... i feel no pain of my yesterday.

Photo link

never have i imagined myself
with somebody like your kind.
... yet every moment we've spent together
leaves a mark in my heart.

Living Legacy to the Leader of the Band

I have always been a music enthusiast and listening to songs is one of my favorite pastime. I was so grateful when my brother DL (now a renewed Cholo as he may call himself) brought me an Ipod Nano. He gave it as "pasalubong" when he came back from Minnesota. Having a gadget like that is not in my list of priorities as a mother of course. So when I got it, I immediately organized my playlist and synced into my Ipod. I only have 81 selected hits with categories: mye music, mye top-rated and mye fast songs.

Music is a universal language. It is the most prominent element in our lives and it connects our souls to our inner nature, our society and the world around us. It has a healing power that lifts our spirit and change our moods into a lighter state. It is a way of self- expression, a source of entertainment. The art of touching humans' deepest emotions is in the art of music itself. Songs bring meaning and significance in our daily life. Music reminds us of our past, inspires our present and influences our future.

There's this particular song in my playlist that somehow moved me whenever I hear it. I love the beat of guitar chords playing and the notes inside the song. Before, it's just an ordinary tune for me until I came to know the singer and the story behind the song. I was even more thrilled to learn that I love two more songs in his discography. December of 2007, while I was on a shuttle service on my way to Platinum where I worked, I heard a breaking news over an FM station that he died due to cancer of the prostate. It was such an unhappy Christmas for his family and friends, even for his countless fans around the world.

Dan Fogelberg was an artist who started his musical career at age 14. He was the youngest of three sons of Margaret and Lawrence Peter who were then a classical-trained pianist and high school band director respectively. He was born 13th of August 1951 at Peoria, Illinois.

"Leader of the Band" was released in October 1981 in his album, "The Innocent Age". This song has helped him raise his career to peak level and gave him a name. He made the song in his father's memory which basically the reason why he chose to excel in this field. He had 20 albums from 1972 to 2003. The contents of its lyrics somehow depict his life and the humble family where he came from. He even said this passage in a live performance in 2003:

"I think if I had been only allowed to write one song in my lifetime... It would have been this one."

"An only child
Alone and wild
A cabinet maker's son
His hands were meant
For different work
And his heart was known
To none --
He left his home
And went his lone
And solitary way
And he gave to me
A gift I know I never
can repay
A quiet man of music
Denied a simpler fate
He tried to be a soldier once
But his music wouldn't wait
He earned his love
Through discipline
A thundering, velvet hand
His gentle means of sculpting souls
Took me years to understand.
The leader of the band is tired
And his eyes are growing old
But his blood runs through
My instrument
And his song is in my soul --
My life has been a poor attempt
To imitate the man
I'm just a living legacy
To the leader of the band.
My brothers' lives were
For they heard another call
One went to Chicago
And the other to St. Paul
And I'm in Colorado
When I'm not in some hotel
Living out this life I've chose
And come to know so well.
I thank you for the music
And your stories of the road
I thank you for the freedom
When it came my time to go --
I thank you for the kindness
And the times when you got tough
And, pap, I don't think I
Said 'I love you' near enough --
The leader of the band is tired
And his eyes are growing old
But his blood runs through
My instrument
And his song is in my soul --
My life has been a poor attempt
To imitate the man
I'm just a living legacy
To the leader of the band
I am the living legacy
To the leader of the band."

Some of Dan Fogelbergs hit songs are:
Captured Angel in 1975
Nether Lands in 1977
Twin Sons of Different Mothers in 1978
Same Old Lang Syne jn 1981

Longer in 1980

Believe in Me - 1984

And now that he's gone, this is my own way of giving him the tribute he most deserved. His songs will live forever in my heart.

But It Keeps On Lingering...

previous ....

Jon suddenly woke through his sleep. Only three hours ago, he's reading the book inside the mini box and now as he opened his eyes, the only thing in his mind was to get hold of it again and continue scanning each page. Having that journal in his custody was a great relief for him yet he knew that it's a huge loss to the rightful owner. He read the next entry and it said:

"Dreaming for me is a hard habit to break. I spent all my life dreaming with someone who will love me more than anything... who will always stay beside me everytime I need him... protect me from being harmed... who will fight for me when danger comes... comfort me when lonesome fills my heart... show me the way when I am lost... who will open his arms to warm me, hold me with much tenderness... give me much love, passion and bring me to the world of ecstasy. Love and nothing more but love will prevail."

He was trembling inside. He felt a rush of warm blood flowing into his every vein trying to find a way out of his system. His body was blazing in fury and his heart throbbed like a fighter without a foe. He could smell the fragrance of her beauty and the softness of her silky hair caressing his whole being. He closed his eyes and dug into his innermost.

next ...

Kenny Roger's Empty Plate

Everytime we have a chance to go out and take the kids for a weekend stroll, we always get our feet on Megamall's ground. We have to be there early like before 10am to secure a parking slot. If during weekdays, main roads in Metropolitan Manila are congested due to traffic well, during weekends, every corner in Megamall seems to be flooded with people just roaming around, shopping, dining, watching movies, ice skating, playing games or just simply sitting on the mall's benches for a day off.

Pye and KD are fond of playing in Timezone so they reloaded their powercards while Aya and I went for a window-shopping. After a few walks there and a few stops from SM department store, we joined the two boys for a new game called "go-go-ball" where the players will throw the ball and hit the screen for a score.

They only earned 7 points. What a tiring game! Their arms were all stretched out by repeatedly pitching the ball and because of that, Pye got an aching shoulder for more than a week. (Sign of old age?)

Then lunchtime came and where else should we eat? Well, it's no argument at all that we headed to Kenny Rogers Roasters at the upper ground level of building A.

The two youngsters never get enough of Kenny's chicken.

We ordered the crispy Combo 1 for KD, Solo A with cheese and garlic potato, steamed veggies as side dishes for Aya and myself, while grilled fish fillet for Pye and to quench our thirst, we had two up-sized iced tea.

And surprisingly, my KD seemed to satisfy his appetite.

For the first time his plate was left empty without Papa finishing off his chicken like he used to.

Oh well that's a nice meal though, we seemed to memorize the taste of Kenny's foods already. I just hope, we'll try another dish next time.

But It Keeps On Lingering...

Beginning of this story

.... previous

She got a lot of unread emails and most of which came from Manila. She took a glance of two messages coming from her Mama Gee and Uncle Reily aside from those text messages she received almost every day and of course, a number of calls every now and then, just to know if she's alright... if she's having fun. Just telling her to take care. Mama Gee even told her via text message:

"I visited Dr. Limjoco yesterday and he advised me to undergo series of tests because of frequent chest pains but don't worry, Uncle Reily was with me the entire day. I badly need a complete rest. Please come home soon. I may feel better with you around."

Karla was bothered. She would probably be staying in Oregon for another week. May be Mama Gee was just missing her too much. She knew that by the time she get back home, everything would be just fine. Her Mama would get no serious ailment. She could not afford another loss.

As usual, Karla felt so alone. She always had that emptiness inside her and nothing seemed to fill up the gray area in her heart. The death of her father caused her deep sorrow. Being her Papa's only heir gave Karla the reason why she's living in an affluent home yet she managed to be modest and simple. In her solitude, she always missed a father's warm embrace... As she closed her eyes to sleep, she remembered that smile on Papa Rod's face.

next ....

But It Keeps On Lingering...

.... previous

The two felt increasingly fagged after that memorable event but before they could enter their new room, Dane seemed to forget something. She was about to press the door keypad but... Oh well! She almost fell off her shoes. She's always like that when intoxicated and who else would take care and help her? Nobody, but her ever reliable bestfriend who's having a headache not because of drinking too much but because she was mentally confused.

It was nearly quarter to 2am when they got in. They both took a quick bath to release any tension on their body. Dane was overly drunk but was able to manage a change for a comfortable nightwear while Karla unpacked her cases... until she gave up. Her search was over.

She got her laptop and logged on to her site. She started to account this day's untoward occurrences and those pleasing incidents as well. But then, she's having second thoughts of adding this entry to her post. This time, she needed to get hold of a tome replacement.

"Today was such an overwhelming welcome of new faces. Tomorrow will be another day but my life has been unfolded by some stranger's eyes that may peel off my entirety."

Karla knew that it was just a journal and its disappearance would do no harm to her except for some confidentiality that was written, for her eyes only.

next ....

The Magic of Million Views

How do we rate something that is extraordinary? Something that is going beyond the usual like a perfect slam dunk - in a scale of 1 to 10 crowns the champion. It's a bird. It's a plane. It's Dwight Howard!
Or something that is imitated yet never equaled like a TV program that showcases talented kids. "Goin' Bulilit" of the Kapamilya network with a weekly nationwide rating of not lower than 30% according to AC Nielsen.

We can rate a remarkable performance either by text or online votes such as American Idol, Pinoy Big Brother, Celebrity Duets, etcetera.

But when it comes to broadcasting oneself and gaining popularity in just one click of a button, is something huge. We can reach millions of viewers by uploading videos on the site known as "You Tube". The website was created in February of 2005 by three former PayPal employees namely: Steve Chen, Chad Hurley and Jawed Karim.

You Tube headquarters at San Bruno, CA

Through this kind of mass media exposure, talents are being known and become famous worldwide. The most viewed videos are the most popular ones and fortunately, A Filipina in the person of Charice Pempengco dramatically dominated more than 15 million hits and still counting. She rose fame and became a singing sensation through the magic of You Tube. She has been crowned one of Hollywood Royalties by E! She performed in various international shows like Oprah, Ellen, and in London's The Paul O'Grady Show.

Charice was introduced to the international concert arena by David Foster at the Mandalay Bay resort and Casino at Las Vegas and was also invited by Andrea Bocelli to be one of his guests in his birthday concert held in Lajatico, Italy.

"Millions of viewers were moved by her powerful voice and that no matter what obstacles she's faced in her life, she's never given up on her dream of something better." Ms. Oprah Winfrey says. During the show, Charice was being introduced to Celine Dion via satellite from Washington and invited her for a duet at Madison Square Garden come September 15, 2008.

And now, she's living her dreams and every success in her life is deeply dedicated to her most beloved mother who gives her the inspiration and strength. Her pride is more than an audience standing ovation but the honor she has yet to offer to make her mother proud.


EMO is a genre of music originated from the hardcore punk. It has come to describe several variations of music with common roots and associated fashion and stereotypes. It's been originated in Washington DC music scene in the mid-1980s. In later years, the term emocore, short for "emotional hardcore" which is being used to illustrate an emotional performance of bands.

Young people nowadays are fond of dressing up like emo, as they call it... their hairstyles are greasy unwashed and cut unevenly to cover the face at an angle... with tighter jeans and ragged shoes... setting a trend of today's emotional kids who can hardly smile, just wearing those inexpressive faces.

Maybe the new image of emo is more of a fashion. Teenagers love to strike a pose like these:

So what seems to be so influential about this emo thing? The trend has emerged to be a negative aspect of society creating criticisms. Emo fanatics are overly sentimental, shy, introverted but such stereotype fashion styles only affected those with subdued personalities.

But It Keeps On Lingering...

.... previous

Graduated at the University of Oregon with a degree in Information Systems and Operations Management, Robert Johnson Miller was an outstanding student and had always been a person of superior intellectual abilities. He's gifted but too premature for a long-term career on an establishment where people just come and go. His only motive in staying and working for the hotel was obviously crafted to complete the pattern of his being... The purpose had been served and he finally found the key to unravel an intriguing story that he learned to value more than his life.

Lying in bed with a dimly lit lamp over his headboard, Jon was in awe while reading the journal that was stolen in good faith. Every letter of a every word depicted in great detail. He could feel the warmth of hand scribbling those passages. The postings were discrete unlike those written in the archive of the author's "Unkindly Haven" that he's following. He knew that somewhere along those lines, he would encrypt the three words that pave the way to Eden's door.

He finished with the first entry dated January 1, 2003 with this last part saying:

"Everything seemed to be out of hand. For that single moment, I lost control of
myself... Feeling so bad about things. Sentiments ruled my heart... still hoping for dreams to come true."

Jon felt for her pain. If only he could reach out to her now but he just couldn't. Time will come that he would have the courage to face her.

He closed the journal and put it inside the box that's been situated beside the lamp. His sluggish eyes were craving for a goodnight sleep as he turned off the lampshade.

next ....

Voice of Humility

Image from the web

An amateur opera singer in the person of Paul Potts has been declared as Britain's Got Talent grand winner last June 17, 2007. It gained him popularity overnight and brought him an enormous opportunity in the music industry. Then a mobile phone salesman, Potts emerged into stardom. He is now one of UK's promising celebrity.

His unique talent dramatically soared even higher when his various performances have been watched all over the world thru "you tube" and his victory even gave him a chance to record an album.

With his modest personality and humble beginnings, he certainly moved his audience into a rhapsody of emotions. His voice truly is gifted. It's his time to pursue his greatest dream.

Paul Potts is scheduled to hold a concert in Manila this October 8, 2008 at PICC Plenary Hall.

But It Keeps On Lingering...

.... previous

After that quick transfer, Dane and Karla returned to Bellmont Ballroom. They would probably do their unpacking jobs later. The program was about to close and the reunion of two prominent names were busy taking souvenir photographs. Cameras clicking there... video cams were everywhere documenting that notable event that captured an evening full of laughters and tears of joy. Dane introduced Karla to her relatives while Dr. Marasigan took a glass of champagne and made a toast to the crowd then threw a loud remark.

"Here's to a long lasting and fruitful life ahead of us. I just want you to know how grateful I am to see all of you. Just enjoy the rest of the night especially the youngsters who seem to get the beat on their feet. Cheers!"

Karla was mesmerized by the warm welcome given to her by Dane's family and she felt like she's one of them. All of Dane's younger cousins, nieces and nephews were gathering around her and she just love them especially Chelsea. But it's already past their bedtime and the rest of the kids crawled to their moms' embracing arms.

Chelsea was in Karla's lap when her mom approached. "Oh poor little Chelsea. She looked so tired. Look! Her eyes are drooping already. Ok, there's mama. Kiss Tita Karla goodnight."

As Chelsea and her mom left, Karla drew her attention to searching for her bestfriend who was then fully occupied with her Uncle Resty.

"Hey Karla!" Dane called her with a tipsy voice.

"You know Uncle Resty here is asking me if you want to model for him. He's looking for a female counterpart for a magazine cover and he's so captivated with your irresistible charm. What do you think my friend?"

Karla couldn't find a word to say. "Well, I'll be so glad, Sir. She wasn't quite interested to what Dane's uncle could offer her... The only thing that mattered to her that moment was her missing box.

"How can I find it? I'm an open book now." She just whispered to herself.

next ....

ERASERheads - On Center Stage Again

If we are to translate this Filipino word "alapaap" in English language, it means cloud and according to Webster dictionary: cloud is a visible mass of particles of condensed vapor suspended in the atmosphere or simply, a puffy mass of different shapes floating in the air.

"Ako ngayo'y lumilipad at nasa langit na gusto mo bang sumama?"

This song signaled the opening of the most awaited reunion concert of the legendary alternative rock band, Eraserheads that made history in Pinoy music. They were disbanded March of 2002 that appalled countless fans nationwide and after six long years, they were bound to face each other once again in a one-night public performance at The Fort's open ground. It was like a reunion of long-lost high school and college peers reminiscing the "good all days" and a gathering of A-list musicians and famous celebrities. The open field was jam-packed overtaking the record of Beyonce's concert early this year with approximately 60,000 people in attendance.

Ely Buendia
-the lead vocalist-

Raimund Marasigan
-the drummer-

Buddy Zabala
-the bassist-

Marcus Adoro
-the lead guitarist-

Utmost euphoria seemed to engulf the entire Global City with the first set of songs but there was such an unspeakable stillness encircling the stage. Ely was noticeably in deep distress though the audience appeared to be pragmatic. The fun, the music were just overwhelming that they seemed to savor every rhythm of the songs. But during the 20-minute break, an announcement had to be told: the joyous celebration had to be cut short. Ely experienced chest pain that triggered a decision to rush him to the hospital.

Despite that untoward incident, there were no "boos", no negative annotations pondered by the crowd rather a complete silence filled the air offering a brief prayer for Ely's immediate recovery.

As the people found their way out of the venue, they were sad and at the same time happy for they were able to witness an enigmatic act of the best band they most adored. They left with extreme emotions... maybe some were in tears but most of them went home "with a smile" in their face.